booktalesy Chapter 226: Again After Rainfall (2)
Chapter 226: Again After Rainfall (2)
Chapter 226: Again After Rainfall (2)
Hiss-
White smoke rose from a cigarette held in Yoo Hye-Jeong’s lips.
“Sigh..."
Although she wanted to refrain from smoking as much as possible today, her resolution crumbled as it always did given her patient's profession. Her face was weary as she gazed into the void, and a sigh filled with resignation escaped her lips again. Then, Lee Su-Hwan approached her with his refined footsteps and asked, “How did it go, Doctor?"
As Su-Hwan handed Yoo Hye-Jeong the coffee he had bought, she glanced at him and then looked back into the void. “You can just call me Senior. We are from the same university, aren't we?"
“But still..."
She was Yoo Hye-Jeong—a psychiatric specialist at Tinta University Hospital and a junior of Shim Sang-Bok, the CEO of YMM Entertainment. She took on the treatment of Chronos's Suh Hyun-Woo upon the request of her university senior, CEO Shim.
“Hmm."
“How is Hyun-Woo?"
“The consultation hasn’t finished yet. We are just on a break, but what is Hyun-Woo like usually?"
“Usually?"
Yoo Hye-Jeong nodded. “Something like his relationship with his fellow members and his demeanor at work. Did he show any symptoms of depression that others would notice? You are always with him, so you should know."
“Symptoms..." Lee Su-Hwan shook his head after pondering seriously. “There weren't any. He gets along well with his fellow members and is very passionate about his career. Until the topic of airplanes came up, there was no problem at all."
Of course, Suh Hyun-Woo was excessively shy and sometimes seemed lost in thought, but that was more of Suh Hyun-Woo's personality rather than symptoms. Thus, when he trembled severely and avoided the topic of airplanes, and then his fellow members expressed their concerns about his frequent nightmares, Su-Hwan couldn’t help but worry about it.
At Lee Su-Hwan's words, Yoo Hye-Jeong's expression grew even more unreadable. “...He is doing well, you say? Does he communicate well?"
“Yes, is there a problem?"
Yoo Hye-Jeong remained silent for a while. Then, with a light laugh, she shook her head and said, "No, I was just wondering.”
No matter what, she couldn't carelessly disclose her patient's condition. She shrugged lightly and continued, “Then, it seems like he doesn't trust me yet. Don't worry too much and just wait. I will go back in after finishing this."
“Ah, Doctor..."
“Hm?"
Lee Su-Hwan's gaze was filled with discomfort, looking at Yoo Hye-Jeong's cigarette. She let out a small sigh and stubbed out the cigarette in the ashtray.
“Sorry, I can't help it when things don't go well. I get it," remarked Yoo Hye-Jeong. She then sprayed some deodorizer and let out an awkward laugh.
“Anyway, let's observe him for now. I will prescribe some anxiolytics and sleeping pills. Just put him to sleep for any urgent overseas schedules. That’s the best solution for Hyun-Woo."
“Ah..."
“I will go back in."
This time, she had to make Hyun-Woo talk. A determined look flashed in Yoo Hye-Jeong's eyes as she turned around.
***
“Hyun-Woo."
“...Yes. I'm sorry."
“Sigh..." I sighed deeply and looked at the back of the doctor's head. She even mentioned lies and making things up was okay. I only had to speak whatever was on my mind.
The moment the unfamiliar gaze was no longer on me, my thoughts became organized. I could calmly reflect on my thoughts. Until just a moment ago, I was in so much pain because I felt I had nothing honest to say. However, now I thought, maybe I could have just said “I fell from somewhere.”
After all, the doctor wouldn't know what my daily life as a trainee was like, or whether I had ever been on a plane... But still, I sorted my thoughts and hesitated for a long time. “...I think whatever I have... will not be cured..."
“..."
“I feel like nothing will get better." From experience, I knew it was best not to talk about pains and sorrows that couldn't be understood by others. I'd only receive sympathy or empty encouragement. The reason I sometimes felt terrorized by people's gazes, developed a fear of heights, had nightmares, or felt anxious was because these were secrets I had to carry alone until death.
“If I don't talk about it... can it be resolved just with medication?" I didn't want to be treated as a weirdo for sharing an incomprehensible story. My hand that was holding the cup was shaking so much that I quickly clenched it into a fist.
‘Why can't I escape the pain even until now?’ Neither my relationship with my parents nor the wounds in my heart had healed. It seemed like the things I was afraid of only increased.
‘Why me? Why is this happening?’ A sense of injustice made me cry, and I struggled to breathe.
I ignored the tears falling and said, “All I want is to achieve my dreams..."
“..."
I didn't understand why it was so hard to feel excited and happy about joyful stuff. “It's my first overseas schedule, and I didn't want to ruin it for everyone, so I sought counseling. Can you just help me handle the schedule well? I'm sorry... Maybe I'm not ready yet. I'm sorry."
The promised ten minutes with the doctor passed. After that, the doctor turned back to look at me and wore a much sadder expression than before. “You will be able to handle the schedule. As I mentioned before, the prescription is done. But I will need to discuss this with Su-Hwan and set up a follow-up appointment."
“..."
“We will have to continue this until I hear something outrageous from you, Hyun-Woo. I can't say the treatment is over like this. Anyway, thank you for saying something."
The doctor handed me a business card and stepped back. She said, “I might not be available during treatment hours, but feel free to contact me anytime. That's all for today....You've cried. You must feel terrible."
Then she turned and opened the door to the conference room. “It's over."
On the other side of the door, I saw two familiar faces. One was the manager, who came with me to the company, and Joo-Han. The two of them peered from a distance to check on me, and then their expressions hardened.
“Hyun-Woo, did you cry?" asked Joo-Han.
“What... How did you know I was in counseling?"
Joo-Han approached me quickly and examined my face. “I should at least be aware of what my members are up to as a leader. I came because something seemed off. Why did you cry? Things must have been tough. I didn't know."
“Huh?"
After Su-Hwan left with the doctor, I was awkwardly caught by Joo-Han and had to listen to his worried words. “I was worried because you seemed to be in a bad state recently. How did I not realize it was this bad?"
“Hyung?"
Joo-Han muttered to himself seriously and then hugged me tightly. It seemed like he had been talking to Ji-Hyuk a lot recently and even caught his overflowing affection.
Anyway, being with someone who made me feel at ease cleared my mind and calmed my nervous heart.
Joo-Han asked, “Do you need your support system? Yoon-Chan is currently at the dorm."
“Ah, please make sure to tell them to let Yoon-Chan sit next to me on the plane, hyung," I replied. I then got up and left the conference room with Joo-Han, who put on a somewhat worried and joking expression.
1. In Korea, the metaphorical "Bamboo Forest" refers to anonymous platforms where people can freely share their secrets and thoughts without revealing their identity, akin to confession boards in universities or online sites. This provides a safe space for individuals to express themselves candidly, offering relief from societal pressures and emphasizing the importance of privacy and community support. ☜